10 years ago
6
Keurig Insists Coffee DRM Brings 'Interactive-Enabled Benefits' And Is For Your Own Safety
As we recently discussed, Keurig is busy making plans to embed new technology in their new "Keurig 2.0" line of coffee makers that will reject unsanctioned (read: less expensive, competing) coffee pods. The technology would also presumably prevent the use of manual re-usable filters, which are usually found for between five and fifteen bucks online.
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What "Interactive-Enabled Benefits" does a coffee maker need? You have one job, to make a decent cup of coffee.
The only "Interactive-enabled benefits" I see is for Keurig to effectively shut out competitor K-cup makers.. Looks like they took a page out of the printer business handbook.. except printers still let you use refilled ink.
When will these companies learn? People don't like draconian DRM and they will not buy your shitty coffee machine. Your patent is up and other coffee machines without DRM will obliterate you.
Don't forget that someone will 'jailbreak' it within it's first week so all of this is rather useless.
I can only visualize Keurig and Monsanto getting together in a dank basement with a whiteboard and develop DRM coffee. Think about it. a specialized GMO strain of coffee bean which only releases caffeine when used in brand new third-generation Keurig UltraTasty™ Brand Coffee Makers.
Better yet, the coffee makers are leased, but not purchased. They require an always-on internet connection. If you forget to pay your monthly "access fee", the coffee maker makes really weak, decaffeinated coffee, then explodes.
Dont forget about the miniature monsanto developed sharks with laserbeams strapped to their heads zapping you as you drink it before it explodes..