I was in the Marine Corps for 4 years. In my units and MOS (job), people and even you moved around the world a lot. My first year was almost extreme in this regard; I lost a few friend at least once a month, but typically more. At first, I would try to keep the friendships going even though the people were far away. Then I started learning that it can sour the entire relationship because it will slowly fade away. The friendship isn't just the relationship between two people, but the entire system: people, situations (individual, relative, group, and setting), location, developmental stage, etc. So now when I part with friends that are either leaving, getting married, having a kid, starts getting unbearable, etc., I cut the friendship right there and remember it for the good times. It's much better than creating a bunch of bad memories.
Had one really good friend who went into the Army. Was in the Bosnia Conflict. Came back after a two year tour a little messed up. Didn't talk a lot about the shit that went on there. While his MOS (Intelligence) generally kept him out of harm's way, he still got enough of it to mess him up a bit. Another buddy of mine was a Marine. He did a little better. Unsure of his occupation, but he worked a lot with the encrypted radio stuff used for battlefield communications. He told me as much as he could about it, fascinating field. Was a little jealous ;)
Me and the first guy wrote a shit ton of letters back in the day. Made communications a bitch. We eventually drifted apart after I moved up to KC. Still email on occasion, but it's been years since I've touched base.
Takes a lot of willpower to decide to cut things off. I can understand where you're coming from, tho. letting things linger ends up worse in the long run.
I was in the Marine Corps for 4 years. In my units and MOS (job), people and even you moved around the world a lot. My first year was almost extreme in this regard; I lost a few friend at least once a month, but typically more. At first, I would try to keep the friendships going even though the people were far away. Then I started learning that it can sour the entire relationship because it will slowly fade away. The friendship isn't just the relationship between two people, but the entire system: people, situations (individual, relative, group, and setting), location, developmental stage, etc. So now when I part with friends that are either leaving, getting married, having a kid, starts getting unbearable, etc., I cut the friendship right there and remember it for the good times. It's much better than creating a bunch of bad memories.
Had one really good friend who went into the Army. Was in the Bosnia Conflict. Came back after a two year tour a little messed up. Didn't talk a lot about the shit that went on there. While his MOS (Intelligence) generally kept him out of harm's way, he still got enough of it to mess him up a bit. Another buddy of mine was a Marine. He did a little better. Unsure of his occupation, but he worked a lot with the encrypted radio stuff used for battlefield communications. He told me as much as he could about it, fascinating field. Was a little jealous ;)
Me and the first guy wrote a shit ton of letters back in the day. Made communications a bitch. We eventually drifted apart after I moved up to KC. Still email on occasion, but it's been years since I've touched base.
Takes a lot of willpower to decide to cut things off. I can understand where you're coming from, tho. letting things linger ends up worse in the long run.