Pope Francis would absolutely baptize an alien from Mars, if one showed up at the Vatican and asked for it. During his weekly homily on Monday, Franics said that aliens — which he imagines could be "Green, with that long nose and big ears, just like children paint them" — should be baptized just like anyone else who asks for it, because it's not up to any human to decide who should receive the Holy Spirit.

Two popes will become saints this week. On Sunday, Pope Francis will officially add to the Roman Catholic canon the names of two of his recent predecessors: Pope John Paul II and Pope John XXIII. It would be better if he were not doing so.

Pope Francis said on Friday that he took personal responsibility for the harm done by priests who sexually abused children, and he pledged that the Roman Catholic Church would confront the issue unflinchingly and impose sanctions when necessary. “The church is aware of this damage,” he said. “It is personal moral damage, carried out by men of the church, and we will not take one step backward regarding how we will deal with this problem.

The UN has said that the Vatican should "immediately remove" all clergy who are known or suspected child abusers. The UN watchdog for children's rights denounced the Holy See for adopting policies which allowed priests to sexually abuse thousands of children.