Especially on the internet, people can sometimes come off 'sounding' harsher than they meant to (we forget how much communication is nonverbal).
This is really important to remember, in my experience. Some of the nicest and most considerate people I know in real life come off as pretty brusque in online interactions. They are often people given to dry humor or winking sarcasm - both things that just don't always work on the screen. I also know folks that are very good hearted, but who haven't developed an empathetic stance toward strangers - often as a result of long term social anxiety issues. It's hard, even impossible, to know if someone deserves the benefit of doubt when a post sounds harsh or rude, but I try to keep these things in mind when I read such posts. It doesn't always work, but I do try.
That's one of the reasons I use emoticons sometimes. When overused, they are annoying and evoke children's SMS messages, however, in our current age of text-heavy communication I believe they actually have real value. So many styles of interaction suffer from the lack of vocal intonation or facial expressions. A simple smiley or winky face can completely turn around the perceived intent of a post.
Yes it looks silly sometimes, but anything that adds clarity or helps convey the intended sentiment is fine in my book.
Great point. I use emoticons in that way too (much to my teenagers' chagrin) and often struggle with the connotation of immaturity that comes along with them. I sometimes end up rewriting simple messages just to avoid using them. But sometimes '/s' isn't enough, or even applicable.
But sometimes '/s' isn't enough, or even applicable.
"/s" is terrible. The whole point of sarcasm is that it's inferred. You don't call out sarcasm, just like you don't explain a joke. It ruins it. If you can't be sarcastic without using /s, then don't be sarcastic.
I agree. Unfortunately, in my experience some people just can't or won't infer the sarcastic intent in what most people can see is a clearly sarcastic comment. They tend to get all worked up, and then I feel bad. So the few times I have used "/s" online have been out of an abundance of caution.
Edit: I want to add that I brought up "/s" in my comment above because it is a known alternative to an emoticon, not because I think it's awesome.
There are a lot of people who don't get that the Onion is a parody, either, but the Onion doesn't start each article with "DISCLAIMER: The following is satire and is not intended to be taken seriously. The events described here are fictional and included for comedic purposes." Why? Two reasons: 1) It wouldn't be as funny anymore, and 2) the fact that stupid people are taking it seriously is hilarious.
I don't even think it's immature--I know some people perceive it as a thing only kids do, but if you ask me it's too useful for the exact reasons you laid out to not use. I also sometimes use all caps or hyperbole in text, more so than in regular conversation, to convey that humor is the intent.
This is really important to remember, in my experience. Some of the nicest and most considerate people I know in real life come off as pretty brusque in online interactions. They are often people given to dry humor or winking sarcasm - both things that just don't always work on the screen. I also know folks that are very good hearted, but who haven't developed an empathetic stance toward strangers - often as a result of long term social anxiety issues. It's hard, even impossible, to know if someone deserves the benefit of doubt when a post sounds harsh or rude, but I try to keep these things in mind when I read such posts. It doesn't always work, but I do try.
That's one of the reasons I use emoticons sometimes. When overused, they are annoying and evoke children's SMS messages, however, in our current age of text-heavy communication I believe they actually have real value. So many styles of interaction suffer from the lack of vocal intonation or facial expressions. A simple smiley or winky face can completely turn around the perceived intent of a post.
Yes it looks silly sometimes, but anything that adds clarity or helps convey the intended sentiment is fine in my book.
Great point. I use emoticons in that way too (much to my teenagers' chagrin) and often struggle with the connotation of immaturity that comes along with them. I sometimes end up rewriting simple messages just to avoid using them. But sometimes '/s' isn't enough, or even applicable.
"/s" is terrible. The whole point of sarcasm is that it's inferred. You don't call out sarcasm, just like you don't explain a joke. It ruins it. If you can't be sarcastic without using /s, then don't be sarcastic.
I agree. Unfortunately, in my experience some people just can't or won't infer the sarcastic intent in what most people can see is a clearly sarcastic comment. They tend to get all worked up, and then I feel bad. So the few times I have used "/s" online have been out of an abundance of caution.
Edit: I want to add that I brought up "/s" in my comment above because it is a known alternative to an emoticon, not because I think it's awesome.
Yeah, I think sarcasm is one of the forms that fares the least well in writing.
There are a lot of people who don't get that the Onion is a parody, either, but the Onion doesn't start each article with "DISCLAIMER: The following is satire and is not intended to be taken seriously. The events described here are fictional and included for comedic purposes." Why? Two reasons: 1) It wouldn't be as funny anymore, and 2) the fact that stupid people are taking it seriously is hilarious.
I don't even think it's immature--I know some people perceive it as a thing only kids do, but if you ask me it's too useful for the exact reasons you laid out to not use. I also sometimes use all caps or hyperbole in text, more so than in regular conversation, to convey that humor is the intent.