Nice and simple. Of course, the lack of any doors might make it a little difficult to live in :P
Welcome to my home, once you come in you may never leave.
How do you get in?
You can get into my house using a secret tunnel behind the south wall. It's 50 paces south from the south wall, take a 90 degree turn to your right, and then another 50 paces. Now, take another 90 degree right turn followed by 50 more paces. Lastly, take another 90 degree turn to your right and then the last 50 paces. OK, lean down and pull up the tunnel access door.
REPEAT 4[ FD 50 RT 90 ]
There's also a secret handshake once you make it through the tunnel.
Secrecy is important, please don't let anyone else know we had this conversation.
I don't understand your short hand at all.
Also, that's a ton of words for "there's a tunnel and a secret handshake"
I won't tell anyone, but I don't know if we can trust anyone else around here
Oh my you're right, that was a bit wordy, but I do love me some words. The more words you use, the more confused the minions become. You can transform the shorthand notation into a handy dandy map by pasting it here.
I think I used enough words to confuse them but here are a few more just to be sure!