You make a very good point about how telling people from the beginning that they can control their emotion could be seen as invalidating by them. I think a mixed approach where you begin by acknowledging and validating the other person's feelings and experience then guide them towards methods of improving those feelings would work best.
The metaphor you used for controlling emotions is very apt. Which is why stoics don't try to control their emotions directly but influence them by changing their cations and perspective. Stoics are opposed to suppressing emotions. The stoic way of dealing with an unwanted emotion is to acknowledge it but not let it control your actions. Then they analyze what they felt try to find the cause of the emotion and change their perspective in such a way that the emotion becomes irrelevant.
You make a very good point about how telling people from the beginning that they can control their emotion could be seen as invalidating by them. I think a mixed approach where you begin by acknowledging and validating the other person's feelings and experience then guide them towards methods of improving those feelings would work best.
The metaphor you used for controlling emotions is very apt. Which is why stoics don't try to control their emotions directly but influence them by changing their cations and perspective. Stoics are opposed to suppressing emotions. The stoic way of dealing with an unwanted emotion is to acknowledge it but not let it control your actions. Then they analyze what they felt try to find the cause of the emotion and change their perspective in such a way that the emotion becomes irrelevant.
Our discussion inspired me to post an explanation on how stoics view control: http://snapzu.com/ReV/what-we-control/
You can also check out this blog about the application of stoicism in modern psychotherapy.