Who said that

~ Jean Kerr...The only reason they say Women and children first is to test the strength of the lifeboats.

~ Prince Philip...When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife.

~ Emo Philips...A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.

~ Harrison Ford...Wood burns faster when you have to cut and chop it yourself.

~ Spike Milligan…The best cure for sea sickness, is to sit under a tree.

~ Jean Rostand...Kill one man and you're a murderer, kill a million and you're a conqueror.

~ Arnold Schwarzenegger...Having more money doesn't make you happier. I have 50 million dollars, but I'm just as happy as when I had 48 million.

~ WH Auden...We are here on earth to do good unto others. What the others are here for, I have no idea.

~ Jonathan Katz...In hotel rooms, I worry. I can't be the only guy who sits on the furniture naked.

~ Johnny Carson...If life were fair, Elvis would still be alive today and all the impersonators would be dead.

~ Warren Tantum... I don't believe in astrology. I am a Sagittarius and we're very skeptical.

~ Steve Martin...Hollywood must be the only place on earth where you can be fired by a man wearing a Hawaiian shirt and a baseball cap.

~ Jimmy Durante...Home cooking. Where many a man thinks his wife is.

~ Doug Hanwell...America is so advanced that even the chairs are electric.

~ George Roberts...The first piece of luggage on the carousel never belongs to anyone.

~ Jonathan Winters...If God had intended us to fly, he would have made it easier to get to the airport.

~ Robert Benchley...I have kleptomania, but when it gets bad, I take something for it.

~ John Glenn...As I hurtled through space, one thought kept crossing my mind: every part of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder.

~ Howard Hughes...I'm not a paranoid, deranged millionaire. Dammit. I’m a billionaire.

~ Old Italian proverb...After the game, the King and the pawn go into the same box.