When I was a kid, I would put real grass into a rollie and smoke it. It thought that's what grass meant. I was not a smart kid.

I do have one story I like to tell. Me and my friends had LAN parties back in high school every other month or so. We would typically hold them in one of my friend's garages. His parents would let us be in there all night, because it was disconnected so they couldn't hear us yelling. Well as it gets later into the night I liked to leave and go for a walk down the street. The stale air and smell of nerd gets far to overwhelming in a small packed garage.

So me and a few others are walking when we see a car approaching. It's a cop. It shouldn't be any problem right? We aren't doing anything wrong right? This is a typical American suburb with no crime. Well one kid bolts running away and then everyone else does. So I have no choice but to join them. He starts coming after us in his car. We end up running behind the building. He shines his light across the area. Most of us are hidden but one of my friends is actually sitting in a bush like a deer in headlights. For some reason the cop doesn't see him. After he leaves we work our way back the garage slowly.

And that's how I escaped the cops

It is way too early into my morning, my storytelling ability would be in shambles. I'm still all blurry-eyed, trying to sip at coffee that's too hot, and listening to my son kick at the wall in his bedroom. I should probably go grab him and get him ready for the day, but then that starts a several hour long process of infant running and screaming, and I'd like to savor a bit of caffeine first.

I'm enjoying the Steam sale so far, I threw 25 bucks into my steam wallet, already used 4 for cards (don't judge me), and I'm holding off to see if Alien Isolation goes around 15ish. That reminds me, we should look into making a Steam snapzu community so we can game together.

Also, man, my finge-okay, okay, he's kicking harder. Time to be dad.

Hope everyone's having a great day :D

Stories, well what about witnessing something gross, and funny at once?

Typical Saturday here, went to the supermarket to grab some food. Nothing unusual at all. It was far to busy and to many people started to annoy me. That is nothing new. Whilst walking through the car park to come home I notice a Porsche Cayenne. I was drawn to the awful alloy wheels. Plus the colour of the wheels (bold gold), clashed awfully with the primary red paint job of the car.

It wasn’t until I got closer I noticed a woman struggling with a rather vocal little girl. I assume mother and daughter. The little girl was screaming and shouting from her buggy whilst the mother was loading groceries into the rear of the car. As I was passing the mother came round and opened a rear door, picked the little girl from the buggy and went to place her in the car. It was at this point the girl decided to let go of some bodily fluids. Well I doubt she had much choice. I heard the mother scream and the girl had brown liquid dripping from her legs, and the mother had it down her jeans and on her hands. The wind allowed the smell to travel in my direction, and it punched my nostrils hard. It made me gag. As I moved away I heard the mother declare "It's everywhere, over us, the car, oh f@*k!" as she then reached for a huge packet of toilet rolls she had just purchased from the rear of the car.

Enjoying the rather warped, twisted things I found it funny. Being only human it was gross to, but I felt sorry for the little girl, I hope she is feelign better. Also feel for the mum, cleaning up poo is never fun. That was my little trip out today. So if you ever go to buy a used Red Porsche Cayenne with gold alloys, make sure the rear seats are professionally cleaned.

I had a pet duck and was sitting with the duck in my lap and the neighbour kid sitting next to me..Suddenly, the duck let loose and the neighbour’s leg was covered with liquid y duck feces/urine. I should have put the duck down and hosed her off,but I was too busy laughing. Shame on me!

Right now I'm sitting in the car waiting for the rain to stop before I watch a baseball game.

When I was growing up, I was constantly out of the loop. I grew up a bit isolated, sheltered, and with my own defined interests, so I never really made connections with anyone outside of school. This made me turn to the internet for socialization and I've spent the last decade or so doing that. I've participated on hundreds of forums, have been on tens of thousands websites. And now I am here of all places.