My phone wanted to update its OS this morning. OK I said. Everything seemed fine until I was walking up a hill and I suddenly hear from my pocket in a pert american voice: "welcome to bixby kxh". At least that's what I think it said, it was in my pocket so I couldn't hear it very well. So I take it out thinking: phone, I didn't ask you to do anything, and I see a bixby page. I thought I expunged that when I got the phone! Now samsung have re-enabled it in the upgrade.

So I look up how to disable bixby, bixby button, bixby voice, and bixby home page. The instructions are old. I have to enable bixby in order to turn it off. To enable it I have to agree to give it permissions I don't want to agree to and I have no idea how to turn off afterwards. I settle for the least option, I get to the settings page but there is now no option to turn off the bixby button. I can make it a double click but a long press still opens bixby. Samsung, you utter, utter bastards.

So I have to get a bixby button remapper. OK done. Bixby button disabled. Half an hour wasted.

I'm still not sure I disabled bixby voice commands.