I hope you're not contradicting the official expert about the deadly seriousness of chatbot technology. Talk like that could mark you as a dangerous subversive.

Come to think if it, how are we supposed to know you're not a sockpuppet chatbot who'll stop at nothing to undermine our patriotic resolve to confront the ever-growing chatbot menace?

After all, if the dogs aren't eating the dog food anymore, as everyone knows, it's because enemy chatbots have spread malicious lies among a gullible public all-too-easily distracted by shiny trinkets and the ring of truth.

I just thank God above that the only thing we have to fear is foreign enemy chatbot armies. It'd be too much to bear if there were homegrown threats to state-approved thinking. You wouldn't want to cross that line without realizing your treason against dogma.

Next you'll be saying our side may've influenced foreign elections, that our terrorism and genocide may be morally suspect, or that there may be something off about the dog food. Be more careful what you think next time.

Now, pick up that can.