Catholic doctrine makes my head spin. More so when there's more than one pope at a time. Like now, right? I don't mean the usual five or six, but the Vatican ones. There's the grim visage of the church, the former Hitler Youth with the soft spot in his heart for serial child abusers. He's the iron fist pope. Then there's the newer, ceremonial pope they wheel out for public consumption. The Latin American socialist with a background in chemistry, literature and psychology. He'd be the velvet glove pope. It's wrong-headed to ask which is the pope. They both are. Kinda like Christianity is monotheistic, except when it's not. Sometimes there's the one god with many names, sometimes they're the father, the son, the holy ghost. They're popes, iron and velvet, plural and singular. As long as it keeps the peasants from rising, I suppose it doesn't matter.