I think too when you're dealing with older adopted shelter cats you need to invest time in their back story, what kind of home (if any) they are coming to you from. A lot of those reflexes can't be unlearned but trust can certainly be gained with patients and empathy. Body language is huge, I guess to a certain extent mindfullness comes into play. What's your blood pressure/perspiration...rescues can show you what kind of person you really are (imo).
I have cats too,and yes patience is the key. They will do the things you want them to do but you must work at it and earn their trust.
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